Knight
by Harukami
Summary: Ciato (yes, this IS a Ciato fic -- Gasp --) muses on Rastaban, filled with Rastaban's stolen power.


Knight - by Harukami  
  
I am made dizzy with this new rush of power through me. So heady, so strong. It almost disgusts me to have it inside me, but as long as it's not with him. No, as long as it's with me, so that I can use his power to help my Lord.  
  
If nothing else, I imagine Rastaban will appreciate the irony. Would. He must be dead by now.  
  
I am not stupid. They think I am, but I am not. Loyalty and stupidity are not the same thing. For years, I've suspected that Rastaban has been plotting against my Lord. Since this Asellus child arrived, I've kept a closer eye on him, finally decided that yes, it was certain. I would not be so rebellious as to make a move against him had he not been plotting against my Lord.  
  
He had no /right/ to be plotting against my Lord. That insolent, oath-breaking--!  
  
Orlouge is not evil. People say he is, but they are wrong. They would not love him so much, want him so much, adore him so much if he were evil. So often, they assume that his 'charm' is magic. As if my Lord needs to use petty spells like Fascination. No, his charm is natural. He has his gentle eyes and his soft, soul-seeing smile which looks inside us, reminds us of what we are, what we aren't. Rastaban laughed at me once, told me that Orlouge's charm had never worn off of me. I didn't deign to answer. What a blind, stupid, /stupid/ mystic.  
  
It has nothing to do with magic, and everything to do with charisma. And with honour. Orlouge is my Lord. I swore to him I would protect him always. I gave away my body and my soul freely to him. I have no regrets. I am proud to be his knight and will never break my word. I will die to protect him, if I must.  
  
I have been laughed at. I have been told I am 'doting' on a mystic who will never invite me back to his bed. What fools they are, to think so. To think that that is why I am here, that that is why I am Orlouge's knight.  
  
I will accept whatever position Orlouge offers me. Whatever he desires, whatever he wishes, whatever way I serve him best. I am not upset to be away from his bed. I am not displeased to be there. If the way he wants my services is through sex, I will be undressed without a word. If he wants me as an advisor, I will study all situations and give my responses, without question. If he wishes me as a fighter, my sword and armour stand at the ready.  
  
This is how I am true to him.  
  
It is not about love. It is not about lust. It is not about obsession, or desire, or longing, or a need to look good in his eyes. It is about honour and loyalty.  
  
I gave my /word/.  
  
When I learned that Rastaban had been plotting to overthrow Lord Orlouge, I went to take him out. I did not bother my Lord with the details; he was busy, has been busy, did not need the bother. I had no hope of winning against Rastaban, really. He was more powerful, stronger, faster. It was death to go against him, but I accepted that. Better to die for my Lord than to sit back and let a traitor serve under him. And I was lucky. I startled him, ran him through. He fell, and I left before he vanished. I always find that part distasteful. But there is no way he could have survived.  
  
I have done my duty.  
  
Rastaban laughed at me as I killed him. He laughed, as if he knew something I didn't. He always does that, act superior, as if he is constantly in the right. Words mean nothing to him. Oaths mean nothing. To him, it's all about him. Insolent.  
  
"You think this is for the best?" Rastaban had asked me, spitting blood. "You think that Orlouge will thank you, promote you?"  
  
I stabbed him again and left. I hate that man. It isn't about thanks or promotion. By his saying so, he was trying to drag me down to his level. Disgusting.  
  
No, for him, it's all about his rank. All about his /promotion/. All about what he can get for himself out of the situation.   
  
He called himself a /knight/--  
  
It is no matter. A traitor is dead, and another will be shortly, Rastaban's power humming through me. He could have been a perfect knight, with this power inside him. If he hadn't been deceitful and disloyal, he could have been a perfect knight.  
  
No matter. I will be it for him. 


End file.
